Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Poison, Pets and the Miracle of Bush Tea

One thing I love about my community is the widespread knowledge of “bush remedies” and where they can be found in the area. Much of my community utilizes bush remedies on a regular basis for themselves and for their children since it’s cheap, easy to find and culturally engrained. Usually these plant remedies can be made into two forms, boiled into a tea or ground to a poultice for external use. My adopted culture is also very suspicious of people like politicians, bankers or doctors, so bush medicine can be a good way to avoid the Jamaican public healthcare system. Here are some "bushes" and their uses.

Bizzy Tea is one of the more commonly used remedies. If you have young children or animals, you’re going to want bizzy around. My dog, Poppy has walked into the house two of three times foaming at the mouth which stopped abruptly once we gave her bizzy tea.

I remember distinctly the first time I interacted with bizzy. Walking to Salem School very early in service I passed by an enthusiastic old farmer who excitedly procured from a black scandal bag a grubby handful of the strange fruit. He explained how to dry it, grate it and boil it into a tea to cure “poison”. I remember taking a few, wiping the dirt from them and taking a picture, which I think is in this blog if you look far back enough. I recently found out that Bizzy is a plant commonly used in Africa also known as Kola Nut. I bet you know it.

Rural Jamaican language doesn’t utilize traditional American descriptors, so descriptions of illness often sounds like this: “Mi get paison” (I got poison) “Mi haa cold inna mi troat” (I have a cold in my throat) or “Mi foot sick”. It also bears mentioning that the “foot” can be the descriptor for anything from the hip to the toe, the “hand” from shoulder to finger, so that leaves a lot of room for error when deducing the problem. Phlegm is also referred to as “the cold”.

So in this vague manner I slowly became aware of the common practice of goat owners poisoning dogs who are constantly harassing (read: eating) their livestock. I’ve known a few dogs who were reportedly poisoned and killed for the very same offence.

In my mind full of buttercups and daisies, I assumed that the goats’ fur was powdered with something toxic to ingest, obviously and blissfully not thinking it through. I only learned that the practice is to set poisoned bait after my dog threw up by the glow of our candlelit dinner (the power was out). It was impressive and terrifying how quickly things went downhill after that. Her pupils dilated, her legs unsteady, stomach clenched and bladder…loose. After a few minutes of dimly lit confusion we realized that bizzy was our only hope.

It was a difficult night as we watched something we loved so much suffer, not knowing how bad it really was or if she’d make it in the end. She ran away at one point and came back an hour 1/2 later with dirt on her nose prompting Evrick to remember that an addition to the bizzy remedy for dogs was soil. I think it has something to do with soaking up what’s inside (I’d be interested to know the science if anyone out there does). We force fed her more bizzy and she struggled away and back into the bush where we could hear her growling and whimpering but it was hard to tell if the noise was from the pain or something else. I didn’t think we could do anything more at this point and the prospect of searching for my dying pet in the bush was terrifying to me, so I chose to go to my bed, but I didn’t sleep.

Around 4am I heard a loud and deliberate whine outside the veranda and Poppy bounced into the house looking about 50% better than we’d last seen her. She still avoided the bizzy and I did not relax enough to sleep until I heard her lapping from her bowl, 5am. It’s now 4pm and she’s almost 100%. We now realize that the growling and crying was the noise she makes when she digs holes, which she was doing last night to eat dirt.

I won’t speak about the person who laid the poison or why it was done. I am too exhausted and thankful to explore the limits of the human soul but would rather chalk it up to Lady Misfortune. But I was glad to learn today that setting poison for dogs is not a cultural quirk that is widely accepted, that even though people keep a comfortable distance from their dogs here, it doesn’t mean they don’t care for them or love them. I’ve heard stories similar to mine since I began relaying my incident and I’ve also heard worse. One woman asked how I treated the poison and when I said I used bizzy she gave me an approving nod and said, “It’s a lucky thing you had some in your house!”

Indeed my friend, I’ll be bringing a suitcase full to foreign!
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Monday, August 26, 2013

Happiness Loves Company Too

My community is a truly pleasant place to be most mornings. It’s cool and breezy and people are fresh and greeting each other. The Jamaican greeting is very important. You may not get a please or thank you but you will always get a “good morning” or a “wa gwaan”, or an “arright” (alright) with a nod in passing. Acknowledging people’s presence is of utmost importance here and following that guideline is a good way to make friends.

On one of these mornings last week I left the gate happily chatting with Evrick and we came upon a neighbor brushing her teeth outside. We greeted her in the usual way and she sang back “good morning”

However.

Without skipping a beat her tone changed to a harsh, angry shout “Bwoi! TOP ‘crape ee bed afore me ‘tab yuh inna yuh yie wi de toot brush!”

I was caught by surprise as we continued to walk through this outburst. Was she talking to Evrick? someone inside? I looked at Evrick who was shaking his head and asked, “who’s eyes are she stabbing out with a toothbrush?” He pointed out that her son had been moving something inside and it was making noise. I hadn’t heard this but, ok, she’s telling her son to stop moving the bed or she’ll stab him in the eye with a toothbrush. Reasonable.

This is not an isolated incident or an uncommon one and it probably has a lot to do with the combination of rural poverty, overexposure to violence in the media and a combative cultural history. Over the last week, I allowed myself to become very bothered by the words spoken around me. After my last week of camp, hearing children repeat the words their parents use on them to their peers, my heart was hurting. In my enthusiastic and positive America Bubble, I was taught that strong words have meaning, and to use them gently. Strong words spoken with force are things to flinch at, not say to your children, but it gets said and it perpetuates a culture of zero personal efficacy or empowerment. It’s normal to ask a child to read something and hear several children chime in “miss im cyaan read” (miss he can’t read) or to hear in conversation “Cho man ya idiat?” (whatever man, are you an idiot?), but sadder still is the prevalence of statements such as “Shuttup, mi a go beat yuh…”, or “yuh nuh good fi nutten” or “mi a go ‘tab yuh inna yuh mout…” and even “Mi a go kill yuh…”. Many children I’ve spoken to acknowledge that they don’t like being spoken to that way, but a child berated by an adult is going to retaliate on their peers in the only way they’ve been taught, with violence and angry words. Misery certainly loves company.

Many families here are not so angry and violent, however, anger tends to be louder than peace… go figure.

As I tried to write tactfully about the observations I was making several times, without being judgmental and emotional, and failed miserably. So I decided to pause for inspiration. This came in the form of an Organic Agriculture workshop at the Belmont Fishing Beach.

It was the first farming workshop that I had the pleasure of enjoying with Evrick, and I knew almost every participant in the workshop personally. These gatherings are always an opportunity to be surrounded by completely likeminded people, rejuvenating the spirit and exercising the mind. The workshop was focused on marketing as small organic farmers, and it took place in a large open gazeebo shaded by trees and 20 feet from the ocean. The breeze was constant even though the sun was hot and a hard rush of rain cooled the place down towards the end. For the first time in a while I was hearing new information at a local farming workshop, people were asking questions and knowledge was being shared. I was glad to see my community farmers interest and participation and impressed by their positivity.

My group rode back up the hill sitting along the sides of a pickup truck, laughing and joking as the vehicle hit every pothole and ascended sharply steep hillsides.

I returned home with an inspired Evrick and we continued talking about the possibilities for what we had learned taking place in Jamaica. Sitting on the veranda with him I felt that familiar glow of happiness in my soul and knew that I could write once again.

So I suppose I now understand why it took me a while to write this post. I can’t be accepting of difficult behaviors until I can understand the behavior and not let it overwhelm me. Also, I can’t feel satisfied with a blog unless it has a happy ending, which I suppose means that as long as I blog, I’ll be searching for happy endings. So if I ever stop and get real miserable, remind me to start again my friends.

Finally, here is my conclusion: Yes, misery will always love company, but happiness loves company too, it’s just not as demanding about it.

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Cycles and Second Chances

The life of a Peace Corps Volunteer is highly cyclic in a myriad of ways. There is a great fluctuation of emotional stability across a range of time, work related cycles involving times of great success followed by by times of infinite boredom; times of prosperity and times of poverty. Yes, all life is cyclic, but a PCV sees and anticipates this cycle in a very concentrated span of 2 (or 3) years. Thinking back, year one is all about testing the waters, year two is about taking the dive. For a volunteer who is the first in a community must see the cycle beyond two years, for her own sanity. Being the first volunteer is like being the first daughter in the family: it’s a lot of bushwhacking, and lot of trial and error. You’re not sure what to do with yourself and your community isn’t sure about your purpose either. The first volunteer must draw boundaries, invite possibilities and trust that the next volunteer can take over from there. Not to say I’m not “making progress” here, being in year two makes it easy to compare mistakes and improve the cycle.

About 11 months ago this year, I was a new volunteer still only 4 months on Island and I volunteered to plan a children’s summer program that the CDC always runs for a few weeks. I hardly knew anyone and they hardly knew me. The entire thing was a chaotic tug of war between multiple parties and was a stressful introduction into Jamaican event planning.

This year, I prepared as well as I could, left for Clarendon to work at the Denbigh Agriculture Show with a bunch of AWESOME people and came back ready for week one of CDC program, Eco Program. The theme of day 1 was, “Respect yourself, respect the environment” day 2 was “Reduce, Reuse, Recycle”, 3 was “Trees” 4 was “Games Day” and 5 was a Nature Walk. We has a few very rainy days, but we managed to balance every day with physical activity and learning, and the presence of my dear friend Autumn made everything go much smoother. The kids surprised me with their enthusiasm, especially doing leaf rubbings and watching Planet Earth. Autumn and I had a blast teaching students kickball and The Migration Game, and we only had one major fight for the entire week!

The last day was the one I was most apprehensive about. During planning meetings we had discussed taking the kids for a walk in the bush and roasting Breadfruit for lunch. I left the logistics up to some committee members, outlining what we would need for the day. Once my weeks started though, I hardly checked in on the progress so I was relieved when the day ended not only incident free, but as one of the fondest memories I will have of my community.

The plan was to hike behind Left Hall, the biggest, and highest, district in Beeston Spring, beyond which is farmland with a breathtaking view of the coast. At 700 ft above sea level, there is a cooling breeze almost the entire way. We drove the bus to where the road ends and led our ducklings in a row, along the footpath that serves a good number of farmers on a daily basis. We paused to admire the view, talk about a plant or just drink some water and the children were so engrossed in their surroundings that the familiar negativity of their interactions was relaxingly absent. About an hour into the hike, we came upon a bare hilltop dispersed with several rock walls and the children begged to run up it. On my approval they set off as a mass, spiritedly climbing the emerald hillside. We had a stretch session at the top of the mountain and a long rest.

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silly face!

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The walk back was relatively uneventful and we were met with a Breadfruit fire on our arrival. Some kids played cards on the blankets in the shade, others wandered around, playing on dead trees and looking at birds. With 5 small Breadfruit, a can of beans and a can of corn, we fed 20 children while the 6 adults enjoyed an added bulla and pear. Rain began to fall as the kids began to finish their plates, the place was swiftly packed and we rolled back down the hill, the happy kind of tired.

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This week would not have gone as well if I hadn’t experienced last years debacle. This year I knew to place a high value on good behavior, have everything prepared well beforehand, how to utilize my community members and what should be expected from Jamaican children. Sometimes the cycle is tiresome and daunting, and stability seems far away, but if not for the cycle, I would not have gotten a second chance to have such a successful week. Here’s hoping next week is just as great!

Denbigh Ag Show

Every year Jamaica has an Agriculture Show in Denbigh, Clarendon. It is a huge fair that lasts for 4 days and showcases livestock, ag companies and the various government and NGO related to agriculture and the environment. Most notably my time there was quality time spent with quality people. The Peace Corps participated by holding the “Kids Corner” of the Jamaica Organic Agriculture Green Village for three days (I was gone 4 1/2). My table involved a poem of a banana named Barry becoming compost. We made a poster out of cut out paper, sticks, leaves and dirt and the pieces of the poems had to match with the picture.

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Some community members even got to spend the day!

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For those who don’t know ^> this is Evrick Smile

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As exhausting as that long weekend was, it was rejuvenating. I met a number of new fellow PCV’s, and their energy and insights centered me. As an almost complete group, we were invited to stay at the home of the Custos, the Queen’s representative for the Parish of Clarendon. Every day I would leave the Denbigh grounds caked in sweat, dust and smoke and end up in a beautiful home with a hot shower, delicious food and wonderful company. A huge shoutout to the Shagoury’s for their unbelievable hospitality and Marie for coordinating it all and sharing her paradise with us.

Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Aspiration, Pessimism, Inspiration- Starting Year Two

It’s been almost 16 months since I landed in Jamaica and I’ve got 14 months of service under my belt, which has finally returned to the third hole instead of the first: A sign that my stress eating days are over.
I have been trying to write this “one year down” post for over a month- I’ve got two discarded drafts that were started but never finished. Why has this been so difficult to write about?
For one thing, post returned to us our “Aspiration Statements”, the essays we wrote in response to our invitation to PC Jamaica. Mine is typically eloquent and idealistic, drawing lines between troubles and solutions, confidently speaking to my plethora of qualities, denouncing life in the classroom, strongly announcing my need for a challenge… and re, re, re.
Those two discarded drafts are an attempt to compare and critically contrast that statement with how I feel now. The first attempt ended in tears, the second with a frustrated slam of my laptop. I mourned my waning idealism, the loss of which I have often declared, would leave me purposeless and useless. I scoffed at my polite descriptions of how I’d handle the challenges of Peace Corps life and my pride in being an effective communicator.
It is still easy for me to get caught up in this depressing belief that I’ve lost my idealism and I’m cutting myself some slack because the pain of this realization throbs much like the first broken heart that teen-dom brings. But I’ve realized that while I was proud of my idealism, it’s not a realistic thing to hold on to in the field of community development. Idealism fosters ignorance, which will never bring organized betterment to anyone.
What one should always maintain, no matter what, is passion. At a young age, idealism can fuel passion, but it is not a limitless resource, this fuel. Sooner or later the thirst for challenge and experience will introduce the all powerful hand of reality. I always thought that to handle the difficulties of reality, to remain positive and hopeful, one must remain idealistically certain that “betta mus’ come” but that’s not true at all. It’s all about passionate realism my friends.
Additionally, I mistook a loss of idealism as synonymous with an increase in negativity. Yes, I have been more cynical lately. But I’ve also been down in the dumps, climbed out of the honeymoon phase and taken off my rose colored glasses. I will not mourn the loss of my positivity yet for negativity is not my natural state and I will (hopefully) never be a naturally negative person.
Finally, in community development it’s hard not to see the apathy of your peers or community members personally. It’s hard to remember that others’ apathy is not your failure. And it’s hard to separate your own positivity with other people’s negativity and then separate that further down: “are they just negative people or are they culturally taught to be negative?” We as Americans are generally taught to be positive and hopeful at a young age but that is unfortunately not the case everywhere in the world- people often don’t feel empowered enough to believe that they can make a difference in their own lives. As a good friend reminded me, “we can only create opportunity for people, what they do with that opportunity is their own initiative." And it has to be. Forcing something into nothing is exhausting and mentally taxing, why try pushing the door open when others are leaning nonchalantly against it on the other side with no regards to your effort? All you can do is show them the door, open it and walk through it yourself.
So I’m medicating my cynicism with a dose of home, and it seems to be working already because as I sat on the plane, 60 minutes outside NY, I was inspired to finally write this blog.

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Hitting the Wall

It’s mid service, and I think a good chunk of Peace Corps Jamaica, Group 83 is feeling what I’ve been calling the “mid service blues”.

For me, it’s the combination of many, many things.

1) I’m on the descending side of a relatively successful project and, looking up for air, I realize how very much more there is to do here. Also having been here for a year, my idealism about the future is also waning. I feel weak with the inability to convey my knowledge to everyone all at once, I feel exhausted knowing that I can invite everyone I know to a meeting and 3 people will show, I am tired of the things that I don’t understand and unsure of the things I do. I’ve been in this relationship with Jamaica for a year now, and we’re at the point where I see her flaws just as well, if not better, than I see her attributes. Best practices are only such when practiced, I will not push when someone else is pushing back.

2) I LIVE ON AN ISLAND. I could get into all the ways that serving in Jamaica is different from serving in another country more remote, but I’ll stick with this for now: I’m not in Africa, surrounded on three sides by other countries, I’m surrounded on all sides by an ocean. Yet I still must travel several hours, take days off, and make accommodations ($ I don’t have) to visit a new place.

3) I just got internet, which is SO great in most regards, but it makes the future easier to see, the present easier to follow and the past a photo album just waiting to make you incapacitated with homesickness.

4) I keep thinking to myself, I hope people are actually easier to deal with back home. But I might also be fabricating this falsely polite and concerned society of people who get along out of a jaded memory of my past as a college student at a forestry school.

These are the reasons I am choosing to disclose, I have to remember that this blog is public, but suffice it to say, I feel hung-over and uninspired. Runners like my mother and my sister would say, I’ve hit “The Wall” and I agree. I actually very much feel like this clip from “Run Fat Boy Run” (I highly recommend watching the whole movie, very funny)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5kmzJcC_HN4

So now I have to make myself see through that first brick. What is beckoning me forward?
Well, Mid Service conference is in a week. This is a time when Peace Corps staff puts all of group 83 in a hotel and organizes workshops about subjects such as community development, organizational management, project writing, youth motivation, technology as a tool, funny cultural story time, fails and success discussions and of course some good old fashioned friend time.

After Mid Service conference I’ll be going home for a probably whirlwind visit with family, friends and the countryside I miss so much.

I suppose I have a whole crew of people waving me on through that brick space, telling me to take a deep breath and limp forward. Nothing worth having ever comes easy, I can take that advice from my mother: the marathon runner, my father: the successful doctor and several friends in Jamaica, raising children and working until midnight.

Even if I accomplish nothing else here, I am still running the race and I still intend to finish.

Sunday, June 9, 2013

Painting a Path

For the recycling fun day, I had requested a donation of paint from Sandals EarthGuard*, the colors of which now reside on 6 recycling bins set around the community.

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A rich red, pale yellow and blue and a deep green.

A day later, that paint was used to re-paint the community welcome sign.

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In the past few weeks, these colors have popped up throughout the community:

the artists gate;

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the new shop;

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And 3 R bar

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In the smog that is the politics of community development, in the exhaustion that is motivating the apathetic, in all of the negativity that can come from the masses of this country, this paint to me if proof of good intentions. Well allocated resources passed on by word of mouth and kinship, not politics.

After the fun day, parents came up to me asking (in the demanding fashion second nature to Jamaicans) where the rest of the prizes are and give my child one now, please and thanks. I have to patiently explain that prizes were for exemplary students and winning classes and I get frustrated looks in return.

Persons who have benefitted from the paint have simply stated to me: “we need more!”

I think that this poses an interesting comparison of the effectiveness of donations and community help. A toy is coveted, protected and creates selfish “wanting”. But something like paint, which is only as useful as a person is creative, is passed along until it runs out.

This has prompted me to wonder at my community members- “If you had three pints of paint, what would you do with it?” 

 

*Sandals EarthGuard is the environmental conscience of the Sandals Resorts*